I sit and wait
does an angel contemplate my fate
and do they know
the places where we go
when we’re grey and old
‘cos I’ve been told
that salvation lets their wings unfold
so when I’m lying in my bed
thoughts running through my head
and I feel that love is dead
I’m loving angels instead
and through it all she offers me protection
a lot of love and affection
whether I’m right or wrong
and down the waterfall
wherever it may take me
I know that life wont break me
when I come to call she wont forsake me
I’m loving angels instead
when I’m feeling weak
and my pain walks down a one way street
I look above
and I know ill always be blessed with love
and as the feeling grows
she breathes flesh to my bones
and when love is dead
I’m loving angels instead
and through it all she offers me protection
a lot of love and affection
whether I’m right or wrong
and down the waterfall
wherever it may take me
I know that life wont break me
when I come to call she wont forsake me
I’m loving angels instead
*
I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
‘Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It’s just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we’re hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?
See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take
‘Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I’ve just got to know
Do you ever think when you’re all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?
Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
‘Cause I’m trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain’t goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin’ away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
x 8:27 AM x
Mr Poon: So, how was the paper?
Class: (groans) "bad"/"so hard"/etc
Me: EXCELLENT! :P
I wrote an essay titled "A Small Act of Kindness". I really must thank Mr Faraz and Mr Poon and Melissa De La Cruz. My phrase book, too, obviously. I think I'm going to score for this one. Vocab! Story! Words, words, words. (:
Happy, happy me.
Chinese is the next paper. Optimism!
Bye loves!
x 9:42 PM x
"I would never want my little girl to hurt from anything: not a broken arm, or bad dream; a broken heart."
Oh, how I loved 17 Again. I'm in love with Zac Efron.
I'm so damn proud of how far I've come. I'm just too in love with what I'm doing to give up now.
Mid years. Ready or not, here I come!
Bye loves!
x 3:50 AM x
You have no idea how much I want to move out of this place. I want to move some place where I can breathe. I want to move some place unstructured, completely spontaneous and free. I want to move some place where I can make mistakes, where I can make a big mess.
Tolerance. Patience. A few years more.
I can do this.
x 3:24 AM x
I'm really very, very angry now. I really find it pointless to study History anymore. Doing comprehensions is like talking to a wall. Lit is just. Too stupid for me to be bothered with.
I really dread the exams. Despite all my efforts that past effin month, I still don't think I'll do very well.
I really want to move out of here. I cant breathe anymore
x 7:26 PM x
Here's what I'd like to do:
1. Sleep when I'm tired and wake up when I've had enough rest
2. Watch Hannah Montana 3 in the weekends
3. Eat at McDonald's on Sundays
4. Make a big mess and be pardoned
5. Memorise the textbook and ace all my tests
6. Run 1.6 instead of 2.4
7. Make mistakes, go uh-oh and have an adult make everything okay
8. Have all the time in the world to do everything I need & want to do
9. Never have to prioritize, because what's important is not what I want
10. Go to church, and WG, and Channel Heaven
11. Have the time & energy to build friendships
x 4:23 AM x
I entered my blog site for the first time in a week, full of inspiration and a runner's high. I read post 34 and lost all inspiration. I can do it! Stalford English tuition is gooood. (: Mrs Ng is coming tmr. Science is going well. If anything, I'm counting on these 3 subjects to carry me through the midyears. Okay I'm going to stop being pessimistic.
*
No scratch that. I want to say something! I'm pretty pissed with a group of people. You know, its pretty evident already that I suck. But however and whichever way you would like to argue it, we're still a team. So the "seasoned" players 5-6 balls all the time, and I get 1-2 or occasionally 3?
"Eunice, give it to Eunice!"
"I gave her already!"
So you're biased. So nagging and attention equates to interest. So when she fails to gain the respect of the team, its your failure, but when I fail to master this, its my failure?
I finally found the reason for my bad mood out of the late. I heard it would be tough. I didn't know it would turn out like this. Its so phsychological, this game; this CCA.
*
I'm all set for informal writing test tmr. Never been more phsyched. SHIT. I just realised that PBL ends at 2.30 and tuition starts at 3.30! Okay. I should be able to get home by then.
I'm excited for tmr. I'm going to sleep soon.
Bye loves!
x 7:29 AM x
For those of you who know the poem, the inference would be that the nightmare was reality(no matter how ironic that sounds). I really don't know why I'm screwing up all my tests. I don't know why I'm suddenly so bad at comprehension. I don't know why I'm suddenly so bad at writing, Chinese, Math. And of course, why I'm suddenly so good at science.
This is such a nightmare, because MYEs are so close. I shan't add in any adjectives, cos no matter how much despair I put into conveying that time is running out, I won't be able to make it stop. At the end of the MYEs, I really don't want to find out that changing schools was just a big mistake and that I should have stayed in my old school, get as many A1s as possible and 3A at the side. I don't want to be shoved into the last class at the end of the year. After working so hard in sec1 to get where I am today, will that be the final result?
Tution, I need private tuition. English, Math, Chinese, History, Lit.
5 out of the 6 examinable subjects for MYE.
I really don't know what to do anymore.
x 8:43 PM x
The day the door is closed
The echoes fill your soul
They won't say which way to go
Just trust your heart
To find what you're here for
Open another door
But I'm not sure anymore
It's just so hard
Voices in my head
Tell me they know best
Got me on the edge
They're pushin', pushin', they're pushin'
I know they've got a plan
But the ball's in my hands
This time is man-to-man
I'm drivin', fightin', inside of
(A world that's upside down)
It's spinning faster
What do I do now
Without you?
I don't know where to go
What's the right team
I want my own thing
So bad I'm gonna scream
I can't choose, so confused
What's it all mean
I want my own dream
So bad I'm gonna scream
I'm kicking down the walls
I gotta make them fall
Just break through them all
I'm punchin', crushin', I'm gonna
Fight to find myself
Me, and no one else
Which way, I can't tell
I'm searchin', searchin', can't find a
(Way that I should turn)
I should, to right or left, it...
It's like nothing works
Without you
Courtesy of http://www.lyricskid.com
x 9:19 AM x
I don't want think about what you feel. I don't want to care what you think. I don't want to be bothered with anyone but me. STOP IT. I know its all for my own good, but its just all the pressure that makes me dread it so damn much. Don't turn my words against me, now. Screwed up pressure doesn't make ANYTHING.
Is it really so hard to just support me? Without any trace of smugness or sarcasm?
That's it, I'm going to move to an island where I can live all by myself.
Oh, look what you've done.
x 3:26 AM x
ARGH BLOODY HELL SHITZ I HATE DOING THIS.
x 7:36 PM x
Science puts things weirdly, doesn't it? Burning of energy, people, its easier for everyone to understand!
I gots to do a lots of works.
Well. Not that much. Memorize D5, revise compare and contrast, and do D7 notes when I have the time. Mr Teo said they weren't graphical, were got not graphical tell me! My textbook looks like porn ah I tell you!
Anyhoos, I gots to goes.
^^
Bye loves!
PS: iLuvCadetKelly!
x 2:04 AM x
We, the citizens of Singapore, pledge ourselves as one united people, regardless of race, language or religion, to build a democratic society, based on justice and equality to as to achieve happiness, prosperity and progress for our nation.
Really?
x 11:22 PM x
I seriously think that tears have a more complex composition than just sodium, chlorine, H2O and a little poof. I think they're made up of disappointment, anguish and hopelessness. But I also think they are made up of joy, gratefulness, and blissful revelations. See, so they balance each other right, and a balanced equation is formed. :P Don't laugh at me, I got an A2 for Chemistry ah!
Therefore, tears perfectly describe my day.
I'm still sad, but like. Begin with the end in mind, and end damn well. I can almost see my distinctions.
B)
Bye loves
(PS: My keyboard alphabets are taking turns to malfunction. Irritating shazamzzzz.)
x 5:32 AM x
